Keep that Kissing at Home!

I love kissing, I do! Its fun, its flirty and its not a crime...oh wait here it is!!!

Within a few days of being here I had already been told by many new friends to keep the PDA's at home. Apparently kissing in public here is a big no-no...unless you would like to get a private tour of the local jail or would enjoy being deported. A little extreme i thought but they actually aren't kidding!

Well i figured when in Rome...

I soon found out it certainly throws a twist on things!

The first thing I learnt was that guys have found a great way to use this to their advantage (is that really a great surprise) It was actually quite cute when the first guy told me he just couldn't resist me and wanted to take me home just for a kiss cause he couldn't kiss me at the club...I didn't fall for that one...ok let's be honest, I didn't fall for that one again...

The next surprise i got was when the taxi driver told us to stop kissing, break it up and stay on our own sides of the taxi...oops...it was like getting yelled at by the schoolteacher!! Didn't try that one again ;)

Well from now on I'll keep the kissing at home!

Aromatic Greetings

I wish I could give you a scratch and smell sticker for Dubai....but you might not like it! Don't get me wrong, I love Dubai. I think its a great place and some of the smells I have encountered here have been lovely....but unless you are an avid fan of B.O. you're going to be in for a few uncomfortable moments...

I first stepped off the plane at Dubai International airport to start my new "Dubai Life" in the beginning of November, it was still 35C and humid here and the crushing wave of humid heat as I stepped off the plane was a clear indication that my DXB adventures were beginning! I don't think they let the weatherman here know that November is supposed to be a nice brisk Autumn where I am from!! I have to admit I was expecting a few shocks as I had never visited before and had had to accept my position in a rather hasty fashion after being allowed only a few hours to research it on the net...let's just say I thought I'd be up for an adventure!!

Somewhat dripping in sweat (a condition I have really become used to in this desert oasis!) I dug my handy flip flops out of my carry-on baggage and proceeded to customs to start my life in the Emirates... and bam did I ever get an Aromatic Greeting! The lovely locals at the customs and immigration desk smelled faintly of frankincense oud (perfume) which is a widely popular custom for the local Emirati people here and many people actually find quite pleasant, I on the other hand find it just tolerable. However the real challenge awaited me at the the baggage carousels, OH MY GOD! uggh, let's just say that I don't think deodorant is a high priority for many of the workers arriving in droves to work in Dubai.

Having been able to located my baggage in the sea of identical looking black suitcases (and with only one missing, it having decided to take a scenic detour to another country en route apparently!) I headed to the taxi stand to make my way to my new home.

And the smells continued... my cabdriver quickly made me realize that Old spice would definitely go bankrupt out here! I can't say I had ever had the pleasure to enjoy such a 32 minute smell-a-ton before (that's right exactly 32 minutes as I timed my torturous hotboxed B.O. smellride!) and I really am hoping its not something i will ever experience again...although living here I have my doubts on that point.

While my taxi driver was very pleasant and made a hearty stab at conversation it was all I could do to suppress my gag reflex. I have to admit I don't think I was a brilliant conversationalist on that occasion. Maybe you get used to it after a few years of living here...but I'm not holding my breath ;)

Bottoms up!

Welcome to Dubai, where drinking is The National Sport. I kid you not. And while you shake your head in awe at the thought of stumbling around this Muslim country completely off your knocker I assure you its not a joke. In fact they welcome you in at the Duty Free shop as you exit customs and immigration at DXB International Airport, where you can stock up on up to 4 bottles of booze or 4 cases of of beer if the fancy strikes you. All I can say is...let's get ready to partyyyy.

It is quite incongruous with a local population that claims to not drink due to their religious Muslim faith. Although even that claim varies from Muslim to Muslim and you'll realize within a day or two of being here that this rule is very loosely applied...in fact there's nothing that causes me more of a giggle than to see a regal looking Emirati man in a crisp white dishdash (the long white robe that is the national dress for men here) sat at the local pub enjoying a pint after work!

The next step in getting established in the Dubai lifestyle (that is after stocking up on emergency booze at Dubai Duty Free) was getting my very own "liquor license". It had to be one of the most surreal and funny experiences of my life. The size of my driver's license, its red and shiny and according to Dubai Police allows me to "purchase alcohol from legitimate retailers in Dubai, and to transport that alcohol to [my] residence" what a place I am now living in!

Once you have a stash of booze at home and the ability to buy more you will likely join the hordes of Brits, Aussies, South Africans and all the other expats getting right pissed at the infamous Barasti bar. If you are new to Dubai and have yet to meet any friends other than the nice real estate lady who set you up with your new serviced flat then head to this hugely popular beach bar and you will be sure to meet a whole new group of drinking buddies with whom you will now be able to stumble around Dubai's hectic party scene with.

Next you can join your new drinking buddies at an infamous Dubai Friday brunch. All inclusive bubbly and food is the draw here...as well as getting sloshed at 11am...and staying that way till 11 am the next day! This is the root of the Dubai drinking scene, you can smell the brunchers coming a mile away as they spill into bars and clubs at 4pm when the brunch comes to a close, as they frantically try to "keep their buzz". As a participant once myself I dare admit ;) I can tell you to make no plans as you will be drunk the whole entire day...and usually wake up still a bit drunk the next...until the hangover kicks in and you moan about your nasty headache and nausea while calling around to your friends to determine if it will be at Yalumba again next weekend or Al Qasr ;) Just remember to keep your knickers on as the infamous brunches have led to other infamous events....remember the lovely "sex on the beach" couple everyone giggled over a few months ago?!? I have a feeling Dubai jails aren't quite as fun as one would imagine... ahhh but that is one for the next post ladies and gents...join me again soon for more I hope...